I prefer men of my own age. But a lot of those men my age are only looking at women in their 20s or 30s. Because of its 'anything is possible', 'sweet-shop' appeal, online dating just encourages men to cherry-pick their ideal — usually younger — mate. Which is depressing if you're a woman of a certain age. An unhappy pattern for plus women who want a new partner. It's an invisible band of women, they don't complain and they just get on with their lives, but actually it's tough for them.
It's hard to meet people, especially in London. I'd like to try to set something up for the single people in my area, I know they are out there. A physical event where people actually meet instead of everybody finding online dating a bit of a letdown and just staying home feeling sorry for themselves. So it's tough because you also have to get out there and find a new bunch of female mates too, and, of course, they end up being younger than you, and then you worry about going out with them and they'll be getting chatted up and you won't!
And in a real way — not just in a 'singledom rocks' way. Because quite often it really doesn't. They have proved themselves, they are good at what they do and at the top of their game. And they will have got where they are in their careers by juggling far fewer balls on the way up. That can be a turn-off. The purpose of your profile is to market you. If you do a good job describing yourself and painting a picture of what it feels like to be in a relationship with you, it will attract the right men and repel the wrong ones.
So focus more on what you have to offer, and less on what they can do for you. The man reads this as you having incredibly high expectations and reliance on your relationship for your happiness. Women in their 40s, 50s and beyond are particularly guilty of this. Be careful not to sound like there is no room in your life for a relationship. It often goes something like this: Many weekends are spent training for my next marathon and singing in my church choir.
You can go on to say that you look forward to a relationship, but really…where can a man possibly see time for himself in that picture? Whilst that's not impossible, the dating game isn't really like that in practice, so finding your own potential partners - whether that's online or offline - is the key to success. In over 40 dating, without doubt, you make your own luck!
And, of course, there are many great advantages to using EliteSingles too! For tips on how to get the very most out of our 40 plus dating service be sure to read the section below More dating advice Finding Like-Minded Love One of the great things about dating in your 40s is that - having experienced so much of life, and learnt so much about yourself - you are more discerning in knowing what to look for in a partner.
Who wants to waste their time with bad matches? We certainly don't want to waste yours! Our intelligent matchmaking system is designed to find you compatible matches based on your location, education, income and personality. Every new member takes our unique personality test so we get a good sense of who you are - it takes a little time, but in the long-run could easily find you the like-minded love you crave!
Over 40 Dating: Your Love-Life Begins at Forty!
Online dating leaves middle-aged women in 'single wilderness'
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