Dating Sister In Law

Both my wife and her husband went to bed, leaving us both alone. She proceeded to open her heart to me, sharing with me all her unhappiness and frustrations with her marriage and her life in general. She told me that I, on the other hand, seemed so calm and cool and that I had it all together. It was at that time I, too, was not happy and had a confession to make. I told her I had been attracted to her for several years.

I then kissed her. She responded positively by opening her mouth and accepting my advance. However, after another kiss, she pushed me away saying it was all wrong. She then went into the house and to bed. The next morning, we left to return home. She remained in bed. I was sober and hung-over and felt like I made a big mistake. My wife called her from the cell phone, and my sister-in-law had apparently been bawling her eyes out. When I got home, I called her up to apologize. She said she was totally distraught the next day but had since gotten over it and said we were just drunk and it was all a big mistake.

However, I started receiving emails from her, and then she started instant messaging me. She admitted she was attracted to me, too, and it quickly turned into an Internet affair. Finally, after three months of passionate emails and messages, she came to visit. We made love several times, and we fell in love. Are we right for believing that we shouldn't justify ourselves to her family and those who view our relationship as suspect or immoral? Or do they have a point that we've crossed a huge social boundary between brother-in-law and sister-in-law and we must hear them out?

They and some other groups around the world have followed the practice of sororate marriage , in which a widower marries the sister of his late wife. You, your sister-in-law, and her parents all suffered a sudden and grievous loss. Of course they want their living daughter to happily marry. But her marrying you will complicate how they cope. Images of you with their late daughter will be hard to keep from their minds when they see you coupled with their younger child.

I had a letter last year from a man whose older wife had died and whose stepdaughter wanted to become his lover. I felt that was violating a taboo. If or when the relationship ends there will be nothing memorable for us to take away from it, except for one thing. Since we met we have talked at length about traveling to a special place that, due to work, distance, and finances, has always been only a dream.

My boyfriend is currently on a trip with a buddy of his and at the last minute they decided to go to the special place! I just want to put his stuff outside for him to collect when he gets back. Am I wrong for feeling so indifferent toward this relationship now? All we have left is companionship, but I want more. Adequate to the Annual Gathering of the Juggalos only for him to go and do it without you. No wonder you want to put his personal effects onto the street. Sure, it would have been considerate of your boyfriend to give you a heads-up about the possibility of a detour to this magical place.

You also seem inordinately focused on a bizarre scrapbook version of what makes a relationship. A romantic partner does not exist to provide you with a documentable series of firsts and onlys. That person should be the one with whom you most enjoy sharing the present. So if you want this relationship to continue, snap out of it, and when he returns tell him you want him to go back there someday with you, or that you two should plan a trip somewhere new and memorable.

In class she would laugh hysterically and make disparaging remarks while the teacher sat silently. I never knew why she targeted me except possibly that I was quiet and nonconfrontational. In the halls she would shove me into the wall or a locker and I was black and blue because of her abuse. No adult ever helped me, my parents didn't believe me, and it continued until we graduated from high school. We went to different colleges and I haven't seen her since.

I know from friends who work there that she works on the floor where I'll be a patient following my surgery. I can contact the nursing supervisor at the hospital and request that she not be assigned to me, but I suspect it would lead to a lot of questions, and in spite of everything I have no desire to cause her problems. There's a pretty good chance she's changed since then, seeing as how she chose a profession that is associated with caring and compassion. But when I think of the hell she put me through, I don't want her to touch me or participate in my care.

What should I do? Advertisement —Panicked Patient Dear Panicked, I have gotten letters over the years from people who are anguished by their bullying of an innocent classmate.


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