Don't assume that he'll learn a lesson by confessing. Don't assume that his parents can shame him into being a better guy. I want you to talk to your inner circle about all of this because you both need support. Forget the redemption and punishment stuff for a bit and focus on getting help from the people who love you. And please, let's not assume that the psychiatrist is just sitting around and validating him. That's not how it's supposed to go. Tell him that you want to join him at these sessions.
And please, see a therapist on your own. Therapy is a good thing. I wish I could tell you whether to stick it out, but I just don't know enough about what's happening in his head. All I can say is that you have to find people to lean on. You moved closer to your family for a reason. This is no time for isolation. Broken families are bad, but so are tense, resentful families who stay together without love and trust. You need to figure out what will make you a happy parent.
That's the most important thing. Find help and start asking questions. Thoughts on her telling her community and him telling his parents? What about their sex life? And the online dating? Be kind and polite and keep your children out of it but still stick with your boundaries. Handling him in this manner allows both of you to cool down and process things. It will show him that you are very upset and are strong enough inside to do something about this problem and not let it continue behind your back.
It also shows him that you are mature and know how to handle yourself without getting overly emotional. Most times strong emotional outbursts or numb cold shoulders keep us 'plugged in' to the drama instead of helping us crawl out of the blackness. If he does open up, listen to him and try to be proactive about the health of your relationship.
Tell him you want to seek counseling. If he admits that he's wrong lots of online cheaters claim innocence due to the nature of the connection and he apologizes, ask him why he does it. Welcome his honesty and try not to guilt-trip him; he may not even know why. If he has been having an emotional affair, ask him what he isn't getting from you that he needs.
Refrain from prying or defending yourself. If you feel too emotional, tell him politely that you have to end the conversation for now. Wait a few days letting things process, and then ask him if he'd like to resume talking about things or would like to go to therapy together. If he says no, remain calm and accept his decline. Refrain from getting angry, pushing him to speak or crying to pull him close to you.
Take Your Life Back If your man cheats online, it's time you put the focus back on your life and your happiness. Afterall, you have to focus on what you CAN control-- as much as you'd like to, you utlimately can't control him. Here's how to go about your search: Popular affair websites include MarriedCafe. Additionally, affair phone apps like Vaulty Stocks and HAA are common. Dating apps like Tinder, Once, Coffee Meets Bagel, and HowAboutWe have grown in popularity because they match users with people in nearby locations, and they tend to remove identifying information, like someone's last name.
For dating sites, it can be a little more complicated. You can always scan through emails to see if any raise a red flag for example, Match. Remember, there are clear legal restrictions on what you can and can't do when it comes to accessing or tracking someone's phone. Make sure you're aware of them before you do anything that might get you into trouble with the law.
What To Do If You Find Your Husband Using Dating Sites?
What To Do If He Cheats Online
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