Lesbian Dating Tips Advice

Like I said, lesbians are elusive and hard to seek out, especially if you live in a small town. We ARE out there, no matter where you live. My number one tip in meeting like-minded girls is to seek out another lesbian to be your wingwoman. Lesbians are usually nice and friendly to fresh meat and are more than happy to welcome you into the fold a little too happy sometimes. So where does one find this coveted mentor?

Is there a lesbian who tends a bar you frequent? Is your cool older brother friends with a cool older lesbian? Maybe your plumber is a lesbian for real, though. Well girl, don't be shy. Go and talk to her! Tell her you're part of the tribe and, most likely, she will invite you to her next night out with the ladies. If she's a cold bitch to you, well, shame on her. Send her my way, and I will set that mean lesbian straight. Karma will surely bite her in the ass, and she will die, sexless and surrounded by aging cats.

Seek out another, nicer lesbian mentor. And if you can't find a lesbian mentor, don't worry. Mama's got a backup plan… Go to the lesbian bar alone. If you don't have a lesbian bar in your town, get online and research a lesbian night somewhere in the surrounding area. I promise there will be one. Who doesn't love a mystery woman who is sitting solo at the girl bar?

I always talk to the girl by herself. I think independence is sexy. At the end of the day, we are a community. And lesbians are so incestuous that we've all dated each other by now. We're perpetually thirsty for fresh gay blood, so being new on the scene actually works in your favor. Also, if you don't like bars, you're totally fine! There is always a lesbian art walk, or book club, or walk across the Brooklyn Bridge. Can I meet girls at a non-gay bar?

Well yes, duhhh, you can meet girls anywhere. However, I don't recommend girlfriend-hunting at a straight bar in those fragile early days of your gayness. I used to troll the straight bars when I was a new lez, and almost all the girls I thought were gay weren't. I made a huge ass hat out of myself. Or I just sat back and watched my straight girlfriends make out with fratty-looking boys, and I would just grow increasingly bitter and irritated and end up overdrinking and waking up depressed and hopeless and hungover.

It's no way to spend your youth. In the early days, bite the bullet and GO TO THE GAY BAR before they shut down. If they aren't, that's fine. They will let you know. But they have NO right to be offended by you hitting on them when in lesbian land. Remember, the homo bar is your territory, and you should feel empowered on your turf. Out yourself as much as possible. No one is going to know you're gay just by looking at you everyone rocks short hair and flannel these days , so make sure everywhere you go, you slip in your sexual identity.

Gay news travels fast. Before you know it, word will be out on the street, and straight friends will set you up with their gay friends. For instance, she tells you she has more of an emotional connection with girls but enjoys sleeping with guys. But you do need to have an idea of where you both stand from day one. Do Not Talk About Exes Via afterellen. Nor should you be talking about hook-ups or mutual people you know from the bar scene or anything like that.

As you well know, the community can be quite tight-knit so it would be pretty gross to talk about other people. One of my worst dating experiences was when a girl took me to a bar, in which her ex served us as a waitress. That was just weird, hated it. You want to start fresh, without any baggage or creepy conversations.

Go To A Gay-Friendly Venue Via autostraddle. What do you think? Guys are often the first to go in for the kill on straight dates. If you want to, just go for it. There are no rules. Honesty is the best policy on first dates. You might as well be open and straightforward. If you continue to date, she will find out who you really are somewhere along the line and your game-playing will be rumbled. Watch Out For The Red Flags Lesbian drama — that is something we want to avoid.

And you can tell if somebody is going to be a whole bunch of drama from the first date. Forget Any Stereotypes Via gaystarnews. And stereotyping people is stupid. She might be butch in the streets and femme in the sheets, as they say. Just get to know who she is and what her deal is. Get to know what you need to know about her in a casual way. Man, lesbian dating is complicated.


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9 (Must-Know) Lesbian Dating Rules

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